There was a whirlwind of thoughts as I stood there waiting to see the doctor. The possibilities are there. I am aware that I can be a candidate just like anyone else as cancer can hit anyone not for any clearly known reasons or on any specified groups of people. Well, at least for now. The statistics from a magazine ran through my mind – It’s like in every eight silhouette, there is one that is in red.

So, when the results came, as positive that I had Ca breast, I felt like “Ok, what’s next? – the poison parcel had landed on my lap. At that instant, Psalm 71 (in the Bible) rings into my ears: ‘The Lord is my stronghold and my strength. He will never let me be in shame…..’ Well, at this time of fear and uncertainties, I know who my Saviour is for He will never leave me nor forsake me.

I began walking with the Lord Jesus since I was 14. I have laughed with children as I sang with them the love of Jesus. I have stood up and spoke of how good God is always to me and declared that I will praise Him continually as long as He lends me breath. Can this now happen to me? Will I now stop praising Him? No, I will not. As a Christian and one who loves the Lord Jesus dearly, I know I am not immune to the troubles of this world – even this dreaded illness of cancer that still baffles us. For as surely as the sparks fly upwards, so will trouble be in this world we are living in (Book of Job)

 

We asked God to help us [‘us’ because I was not alone. It is not ‘I’ but my family especially my husband who went through every step along the way with me] through it – the inconveniences of numerous trips to the hospital,  the learning of patience as we wait each time for the doctors and the systems, the side effects of chemotherapy. Like everyone else, I had apprehensions and fears. I didn’t cheer at every cycle that comes. In fact I argued that maybe I don’t need it or my body can’t take it! But I know one thing – I crawled and sat quietly in the palm of my Creator’s hands. In there, I experienced peace, confidence and strength.

So what’s the aftermath…What do I advocate? More in reality how am I managing life after the encounter. Have I changed?

 

Definitely, physically I seem to feel more tired than before. It’s improving. But still I have to change my ways a bit –        Try to take on less. ‘Work three hours rest two’ –        Don’t teach (very stressful when you have slow-coming-along students) – but share. –        Try not to do and be in the limelight. Take a back stage role – pray more. –        Eat well - I have no problem with that. I can take oats with four-angled beans, bananas, raisins and some sunflower seeds every morning for the next twenty years! –        No time to eat! I must spend more time to eat. Don’t rush. Don’t love work too much to forego food. –        Don’t forget to exercise. But don’t overdo. Know my limits. Basically relax and not tax my body.–        Don’t be so serious and concentrate so much on thinking alone. Take deep breaths in and let go – give a broad smile. It doesn’t matter that you are smiling to yourself. Look up to heaven, smile and give thanks.  I am learning, always learning. Maybe I will write more as I learn more along the way and when the children stop calling for me. God willing, I will.   

Testimony by Siew Choo

In June 2007 I was told by the doctor that my lumpectomy result was malignant. The doctor advised a total mastectomy and I thank God that I experienced His peace and comfort. I did not fear nor did I worry, I was able to eat and sleep well in spite of the news! I was encouraged and comforted by God’s words, His very presence, His providence and the care and love of my family especially my husband and God’s children during the traumatic days. God allowed cancer survivors, some whom I do not even know to encourage me. God allowed these people to meet my needs too and it was a time of humbling as I allowed others to help and provide for me. I took it as from the Lord – “JEHOVAH JIREH, MY PROVIDER HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR ME”.

I also experienced the Lord’s presence through His still small voice. I heard a voice whispering in my ears Psalms 23 and singing a chorus to me while the nurses wheeled me into the operating theatre. I knew this happened because there were many people upholding me in prayers and the Lord heard their prayers. Praise the Lord!

During my chemotherapy days, the Lord continued to show me His providence. I was able to go about as usual but with my wig on. I didn’t realized how vain I was until I lost my hair about the 3rd week after my 1st chemotherapy. I didn’t cry when I lost my breast (probably that part could be covered) but I cried when I start losing my hair. Again, the Lord provided sweet and kind people to support me, someone to cut my hair very, very short (GI style) and someone to bring me to the shop to buy a wig and even someone to sponsor my wig! I again heard the Lord’s voice again on the day I was going to crop my hair because my tears were rolling non-stop – “I thought you never like your hair, you have to perm it, do treatment etc. You will have new hair!” The Lord kept His promise; today my hair is more beautiful hair than ever before!

I was spared from many of the side effects of the chemotherapy e.g. I didn’t vomit. I lost appetite for a few days but everything was back to normal by the 3rd day. I was able to keep all my appointments and managed to finish my chemotherapy on the dot of time 18th Dec 2007. Many people prayed and visited me during that time. I want to thank God for His mercy and grace and to all who interceded in prayers for me without which I do not think it would be so smooth flowing. I want to encourage each person who is going through this journey to put their trust and faith in God to help them go through such challenging days as we are not able to do it by ourselves.

I thank God for each new day that He has given me and His mercies are new everyday. To God be the Glory!

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